Come on Spring I'm fed up. I want it now!!!



I'm just looking out of my window watching the skys being tossed around and the rain hitting anything in sight. It must be the most indiscriminate mugger, the rain.
Doesn't matter who you are or where you are going, there's no A list as far as the rain is concerned. If you are the Queen, you still need someone to hold an umbrella for you.If you 've just rescued a whole school bus of kids against all the odds... it doesn't matter, rain will mug you and soak you through to the skin.



So you think you can beat it? Buy an umbrella. No good, rain's accomplice will grab it, turn it inside out and step on it so what you were holding is now a dangerous implement more likely to gouge you in the eye than protect you.

O.K. So you buy the best rain macs, wet-proof hats, boots (preferably red with sexy heels). I've even seen people wearing waders, wet-proof trousers and plastic capes.

Plastic capes !! Where do these come from? When it rains suddenly you see about fifty tourists taking photos with plastic capes on. They look like overgrown kindergarten kids with old wrinkly faces and very bad make-up. With plastic macs flying up into the air , which collect all the rain falling in their environ. Channeling the rain like a funnel so that they get soaked more than if they had been at kindergarten, jumping into puddles .

You can see the tourist guide holding up her fancy umbrella, saying "We will just walk around in the rain for the next half hour so that you are all totally soaked to your skins. Then we will sit down and have a nice cup of tea with scones and jam.The scones might get a little wet and soggy because of all the rain pouring from your plastic hoods as you bend your head forward to drink your tea. Then we will stand in the rain for two and a half hours so that we can get into Madame Tussauds.

Anyway, I digress perhaps.
So, are you ready for any possible mugging by rain? Er... yes.But you are feeling a bit hot and sticky and ... yep! Your friend, sun , decides to come out to play.Rain hides away and you are left with the full effect of wearing plastic on a warm balmy day. So do you go back and get changed? Er ... no, can't be bothered and in any case the rain is bound to jump on you just around the corner. you might get some weird looks ( but we are used to this aren't we girls?)Then they start thinking- "Mmmm they must know something about the weather I don't. Better buy a brolly . And maybe a mac. Oh and some lip gloss please."